//
archives

Ted Cruz

This tag is associated with 11 posts

Flying Dildos

Chances are there’s a conservative politician under your bed or on your favorite news show screaming that sex, and the sex industry, are the cause of moral decay. Why? In April, reporters jumped all over GOP loser Ted Cruz’s vehemently anti-dildo and anti-masturbation track record from back when he was solicitor general in Texas. The … Continue reading

The B*tt Plug Stops Here

Media jump on the opportunity to report about politicians and their proclivity to invade our bedrooms and tell us that sex and the sex industry cause moral decay. So in April reporters jumped all over Ted Cruz’s vehemently anti-dildo and anti-masturbation track record from back when he was solicitor general in Texas. The reports positioned … Continue reading

On Flew into the Cuckoo’s Nest

Isolated, Starving and Losing Hope

The Iowa Caucus spectacle started with snarky humor and, by Monday night, will probably end in horror (if it hasn’t already).  And the whole thing could have been prevented. It started on a high comedy note. While the candidates were getting the lay of the cornfields, the UK Parliament was devoting three full hours to … Continue reading

Send in the Clowns

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made Ted Cruz. (h/t Mark Twain) ***

The Week in Politics

THEY ARE BLINDING YOU WITH SCIENCE Everything you need to know about last week’s politics for this week’s cocktail party. Calling Mr. Wizard! This week, Sen. Ted Cruz and Sen. Marco Rubio no doubt pulled out their Texas science books to brush up on God and creationism when they were appointed to lead the influential … Continue reading

Miles of Aisles of Dissent

Recently, the Pew Research Center reported that the number of Americans with a “highly negative” view of the opposing party has more than doubled in the last 20 years. Americans hate one another more than ever, it seems. And we’re always finding new platforms to express it! Which, presumably, is part of the problem. Obstructionist … Continue reading

The Lying Nun

Have you ever secretly wanted to be a fly on the wall at a GOP fundraiser? No? Why not? Liberal infiltration at private events is what got us Mitt Romney’s infamous comments about the “47%” and, more recently, Republican Congresswoman Renee Ellmers’ comments that Republicans can reach those elusive lady voters as soon as they … Continue reading

The Week in Politics

BLOOD SUCKERS (NSFW) Riding high on the success of his coloring book, McCarthy wannabe and America’s leading argument for closing the Canadian and Mexican borders, Ted Cruz, accepted a $1.5 million book advance offer from HarperCollins. The book hasn’t been written yet, and chances are no one other than a junior editor at HarperCollins will … Continue reading

The Rise and Thrall of Paul Ryan

Complete this sentence: Republicans in 2013 were: (a) hijacked once again by the extreme right-wing; (b) getting worse at disguising their racism; (c) hell-bent on destroying the country; or (d) sexier than ever. Wait! Before you choose, allow us to make a case for that last option. After all, consider what 2013 gave us: An … Continue reading

The Week in Politics

The Week in Politics: Stocking Stuffers Just in time for last-minute holiday shopping, some of the usual right-wing suspects have got your back. No, they’re not helping you or your Aunt Mary find a job so you can actually afford to go shopping. But they are producing some affordable stocking stuffers! First up, pizza mogul … Continue reading

Categories