“Years ago, I stopped eating anything that could see or think during its time on Earth. But after Citizens United, politicians got too damn expensive.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“I used to hope and dream. Now I just keep a couple fingers crossed.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“I know that most of my Republican friends want to be honest, but they just can’t keep their mouths shut.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“A decent person would tell any idiot they find in a hole to stop digging. But when it comes to Newt, I’m taking bets on when he’ll get to China.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“Asking forgiveness is the hardest thing a feminist can do. So I stopped.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“If the right people were medicated, I wouldn’t have to be.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“I’m a big fan of civilization. And I plan to stick around until somebody has the sense to adopt it.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“Every year, my favorite guests turn out to be the ones who stayed at home.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“To err is human, but to really screw things up takes a Republican.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
Today in 2005, White House counsel and certified imbecile Harriet Miers withdrew her nomination to the Supreme Court after three weeks of criticism. Including this, from Aunt Betty: “I heard her say that George Bush is the most intelligent person she knows. Forget the race for the court, that should disqualify her from the human … Continue reading
“Why did I marry a Republican? I knew that an idiot’s problems would be vastly different from mine.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac
“God hasn’t always been good to me, but She’s been a Hell of lot more patient than Bank of America.” -Aunt Betty’s Almanac *** Don’t forget to check out Lester & Charlie’s new book! ***